Convicted
by Anna Kaiya Freeman
Summary: In 19th Century England, many things Ciel Phantomhive participated in behind closed doors were considered illegal. He knew this, yet for some reason could not stop. Ciel/Sebastian. [On Hold]
1. Prologue

**I ask that you please read my Author's Note before you read my fic. **

**A/N: **I am a very large _Kuroshitsuji_ fan, and love a great Ciel/Sebastian smut fic as much as the next fangirl. But, I want to take this fic farther than that, and touch on a much deeper issue.  
_Kuroshitsuji_ takes place in late 19th Century England. Unfortunately, back then, there were laws and practices against homosexuality that could end in severe punishment. The death penalty for such was abolished in 1861—about twenty-six years before _Kuroshitsuji's_ storyline, if I've done my math correctly—but that was about it. If found convicted of buggery, a person could be kept in penal servitude for life, or serve a term no less than ten years in prison. Same-sex sexual activity did not become legal in England until 1967, and civil partnerships not until 2005.  
In this fic, I want to delve into the hardships that were faced back in the 19th Century. Even with _Kuroshitsuji's_ supernatural storyline, I don't think these are facts that can just be overlooked.  
Thank you for reading my author's note, and I hope you enjoy "Convicted."

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Kuroshitsuji_. I am merely fan, and make no profit off of this fan fiction.

_Convicted – Prologue _

"_Shameful," _He thought. "_You are shameful, Ciel Phantomhive_." The butler thrust into him again, hitting that one spot that sent jolts of pleasure throughout his small body. Ciel cried out in ecstasy and dug his fingernails into Sebastian's back. The demon smirked and quickened his pace. The boy felt like he was going to melt beneath the demon.

"_Shameful," _The word passed through Ciel's mind again as both master and servant groaned as their climaxes neared. Sebastian's smooth, cool fingers moved from the boy's nipples down to his young member to stimulate both of Ciel's most sensitive areas at once. The sensation was unbearable and Ciel saw stars as Sebastian once again slammed his cock against his pleasure spot. He was driven over the edge. Ciel came with a passionate scream that Sebastian just barely managed to stifle with a bruising kiss. The young boy's body jolted and twitched from his orgasm and he groaned low in his throat when his butler also climaxed.

"_Shameful,"_ He felt the demon's seed fill him up and both lay next to each other, minds whirling from their passion-induced highs. Ciel blindly grasped for Sebastian, still wanting to feel his soft skin. His butler fulfilled his unspoken request and scooped the boy into his arms.

"Young master, do you wish for me to stay with you tonight?"

"Yes," Ciel answered and wrapped his arms around Sebastian's neck. "I do." The demon gave a nod to acknowledge his master's words and pulled the blanket up to cover their naked bodies.

"_You are shameful, Ciel Phantomhive," _He thought as he drifted into a deep sleep. _"You are shameful, but for some reason love every minute of it." _


	2. Chapter One

**I ask that you please read my Author's Note before you read my fic. **

**A/N:** Here is chapter one. Sorry it took me so long to finish. I hope you enjoy it. Also, here are some notes on things that will appear in this chapter:  
I make mention to _The Labouchere Amendment _in this chapter. To put it simply, this Amendment made it possible to prosecute homosexual males of sodomy/buggery with out any actual proof that it took place. If I've done my math right, I believe it was passed about four or five years before _Kuroshitsuji's_ storyline.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _Kuroshitsuji_ and am not making any profit off of this. I am merely a fan.

_Convicted – Chapter One_

Ciel's eyes fluttered open. He knew instantly that he was alone in his bed. Sebastian was not there. He wondered—as he always did—if the previous night had been a dream. The dull ache in his rear and lower back proved the Earl wrong. He let out a relieved sigh and savored the only concrete proof that the amazing night he had experienced was not a mere fantasy.

But, as always, his momentary relief disappeared and was replaced with a feeling of shame. Ciel closed his eyes and tried to block out the onslaught of mental torture.

"_Undignified,"_

"_Disgusting,"_

"_Unnatural," _

"_Sinful,"_

"_Perverse," _

"_Immoral," _

"_Lecherous," _

"_Shameful,"_

"_Shameful,"_

"_SHAMEFUL," _

A knock on his door made him jump. Sebastian came in soon after, bringing him his morning tea. Ciel watched his butler carry out his morning duties with an emotionless expression. Sebastian greeted him, opened the curtains, poured his tea, all while rattling off the day's events. When he finally kneeled at the Earl's bedside, they met eyes for the first time since the previous night's passionate encounter. Expression unchanging, Ciel lifted his hand and placed it on his butler's shoulder. Narrowing his eyes, he finally spoke.

"I thought I told you to stay with me."

"Oh?" The demon replied with a devious smirk. "I didn't know Young Master was so intent on keeping me at his side, even when he awakes in the morning. Perhaps he would have preferred to wait for his morning tea instead of having it right when he wakes?" Ciel scoffed at Sebastian's sarcasm and released hold of his shoulder.

"Whatever," He muttered. Sebastian smiled brightly and began dress the Earl for the day. Ciel wished that once in a while, his butler would actually hold true to that request, and stay with him until he awoke. Even if it meant putting things slightly behind schedule.

Because if he awoke next to a demon, maybe it would be easier to escape the mental torture and reminders that plagued his mind. Maybe if he awoke next to a demon, he could continue his day in peace instead of dread and shame.

"Your tea, Young Master," Sebastian said and extended a hand that held the saucer and teacup. Ciel ignored the tea in his face and reached past it to grasp the back of his butler's neck. Carefully, he closed the distance between them, and pressed his lips against Sebastian's in a gentle kiss. When they broke apart, the demon chuckled and handed Ciel his tea. "Breakfast will be served soon, Young Master. Please, follow me."

There was a time when Ciel would have hurled at the mere thought of the things he had been participating in. But, oh, how quickly things can change. And change they did.

Sexual things and women were never on the forefront of the young Earl's mind. He had more pressing matters to deal with as the Head of the Phantomhive house. Besides, he was betrothed. Sometimes, it would confuse him how he felt absolutely nothing towards his fiance and her beauty. He knew full well how beautiful Elizabeth was, but it never seemed to have any sort of effect on him. Ciel had shrugged it off as his young age, and was sure as he grew older, he would probably start to get those troublesome emotions that seemed to put all the adult men into a fix.

Ciel did grow older. He was still young—just barely a teenager—but not young enough to be spared from an adolescent's hormones. He was starting to have odd feelings and sexual urges that he couldn't ignore. And whenever he tried to satisfy those urges with his own inexperienced hands, it was never Elizabeth who was floating in his head. In fact, it was never a female of any sort.

It was always a male. More specifically, it was almost always Sebastian. He satisfied his sexual urges while thinking of his _butler_. His very talented, very loyal, very handsome, very attractive, very _male_ butler. It tore him apart. He tried everything he could to fulfill his desires to anything but a man. Imagine an attractive woman. Imagine Elizabeth, imagine Meilin, imagine... hell, even Ran-Mao will do!

But one way or another, he always found himself panting, moaning, and fingering himself to the image of Sebastian.

And it terrified him. Even if he and Sebastian had never even participated in such acts with each other, if any one found out about the Earl's true sexual preferences, it made little difference. The damned Labouchere Amendment that was passed not even ten years ago made sure of that. Though no longer punishable by death, buggery or sexual relations with another man were still a serious crime.

As a Phantomhive, breaking some laws was never a huge concern as long as it got the job required of him done. But this was not a matter of the Queen. Breaking those laws would not be pardoned because of his status as the "Queen's Guard Dog." He was shaming his family, his company, and himself for even _thinking_ about such things, let alone acting on them.

But it soon became so much more than Ciel's teenage hormones. When Sebastian actually entered the picture itself, things became so much better, yet so much worse.

The butler found the young boy one night moaning out Sebastian's name and fingering himself vigorously, lost deep in his fantasies. Sebastian had heard the Young Master call his name, but this was not what he had been expecting.

"My, my, Young Master," He said, snapping Ciel out of his pleasure. "I never knew you thought of me _this_ fondly."

"Seba—Sebastian?" Ciel was frozen in shock, all the blood drained from his face. This was it. His life was over. If even one person knew—even if that one person happened to be a demon—he was sure that he had no chance of ever regaining his dignity. "Sebastian, I—I—" He stumbled on his words as the butler began to walk towards him.

"Yes, Young Master?"

"I—I order you to never breathe a word of this!" Ciel yelled, clamping his eyes shut and pulled his legs up against his chest to hide his face in his knees. The demon stopped dead in his tracks, a somewhat dumbfounded expression on his face.

"Pardon?"

"You must not ever breathe a word of what you have seen tonight. In fact, I order you to forget it entirely!" Sebastian sighed.

"Unfortunately, Young Master, I cannot simply forget things, even if you order me to," He said.

"Yes, but I still ordered you to never speak of it again."

Sebastian tilted his head to the side, and once again began to move towards the Earl's bed. The demon was at a loss for why his Master was reacting at this level. He had expected embarrassment, yes, but not a frantic stream of orders, those including _forgetting_ it entirely. Sebastian stopped once again when he realized Ciel was trembling. But it was not from the pleasure the boy had been feeling earlier; it was from fear.

"Ah, I remember now," Sebastian whispered and kneeled down at his Master's bedside. "There are laws against this in your country right now, aren't there?" Ciel's head snapped up to meet the demon's eyes. Sebastian gave an irritated sigh. "You humans never cease to amaze me. Placing laws and punishments on natural facts of nature. What do you hope to achieve by restricting such a thing?"

Ciel stared at the demon, and listened to his words with awe. The way Sebastian talked, it was like the laws were against _breathing_, not sodomy.

"Sebastian—"

"Young Master, I am here to serve you in every possible way," The demon said with a small smirk. "It would be against my aesthetics to ignore your needs." Ciel began to tremble again as the demon stood and began to undress himself.

"Sebas—Sebastian!" He exclaimed. "What are you—? We can't—We can't do this! If anyone ever—ever found out—" Ciel was close to tears now. Everything he wanted was staring him in the face but he couldn't reach out and take it. It was wrong, immoral, unnatural, shameful—

Sebastian crawled onto the bed and cupped Ciel's face in his hands. Slowly, the demon leaned in and kissed the boy softly. He gasped in surprise, and the demon used the opportunity to slip his tongue into his mouth. Ciel was inexperienced and sloppy, but Sebastian was patient with him.

It was not long before their tongues were exploring each other's mouths and Ciel was up in the other man's lap with his legs wrapped around Sebastian's waist. The demon could feel his Master's erection pressing against his body and could not help but smirk. Slowly and expertly, he maneuvered one of his hands under Ciel's nightgown and began to tease it with his fingers. The boy broke the kiss and began to moan from the pleasure surging through his body from Sebastian's actions.

"Sebas—Sebast—please, no—ahgnnnn!" His final pathetic attempts to stop his shameful actions were easily tossed aside by the demon. Sebastian raised an eyebrow and gave a somewhat amused smirk. He held his Master in one of his arms and laid him down on the mattress. Ciel was becoming lost in the ecstasy that his butler was giving him. Leaning over him, and planting passionate kisses on Ciel's neck and chest, Sebastian finally inserted a finger into his small entrance. The boy groaned and bucked his hips as the demon curled his finger.

"Trust me, Young Master, when I say this," Sebastian whispered into Ciel's ear. "You live in an ignorant society." Those were the only words the Earl's pleasure-fogged brain needed.

"Sebastian...! More! Don't stop!"

"Yes, My Lord."

"_You live in an ignorant society."_

Every time Ciel ever showed any signs of doubt about his feelings or actions, Sebastian would whisper that in his ear and plant a soft kiss on his neck. Those words always calmed the Earl down, and kept the mental torture at bay, but they could never banish it completely.

Ciel walked behind his butler—slower than usual because of the soreness in his rear—to the dining room for breakfast. Sebastian noticed his Master's slow pace, and turned back to him with a knowing smirk.

"Young Master seems to be in some pain this morning," He said with a chuckle. "Perhaps you are too young for that sort of activity after all." Ciel's cheeks flushed pink from irritation and embarrassment.

"Don't be ridiculous. I'm not a child," He hissed, speeding up his pace and wincing at the pain.

"Perhaps I should carry you to the dining hall," Sebastian suggested.

"No, thank you," Ciel shot back.

When they entered the dining room, his servants were waiting for him, like always. They all greeted him with a cheerful chorus of "Good morning, Young Master!" He nodded his head in acknowledgment, but walked swiftly past them to avoid their gaze. No matter how painfully obvious it was, he knew his servants were oblivious to he and Sebastian's actions. But even still, Ciel disliked their eyes watching him. What if he slipped up somehow? What if they could tell he was in pain? What if they figured out what that pain was from?

He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Sebastian smiling down at him. Their eyes met, and Ciel knew exactly what his demon butler was conveying to him with that knowing grin.

"_You live in an ignorant society."_

Ciel sighed and sat down at the table to eat his breakfast.

"_That may be true, Sebastian. I may live in an ignorant society. But no matter how I struggle, that ignorant society still has it's laws chained around my neck." _


	3. Chapter Two

**I ask that you please read my Author's Note before you read my fic. **

**A/N:** Here is Chapter Two. I'm sorry it took so long for me to update. It may not seem like it, but this was a rather difficult chapter to write. Thank you for being so patient with me. This project is a lot bigger than anything else I've written before, and I still get over-whelmed thinking about it sometimes.  
Now, I would like to address my portrayal of Meilin in this chapter before I get a lot of reviews about it. I tried the best I possibly could to combine Meilin's attitude in the manga/anime with the attitude that someone living in 19th Century England would actually hold. I'm sorry if I ruined how you think she would act in this situation, but I am trying to stay true to history as well as _Kuroshitsuji_.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own _Kuroshitsuji_. I am merely a fan and do not make any profit from writing this.

_Convicted – Chapter Two_

The afternoon sun shone through the large window of Ciel's office, illuminating the paperwork that had been forgotten due to a splitting headache. He rubbed his temple with his thumb and middle finger, hoping in vain that said motion would somehow ease the pain. With a defeated sigh, he put his head down against the cool wood of his desk.

A twisting feeling in his stomach soon accompanied his throbbing head. Ciel moaned in irritation. He knew full well that the stress was starting to physically effect him, but was far too proud to admit it out loud.

"Why am I like this?" He whispered to himself. "Why can't I stop?"

He was referring, of course, to his "relationship"—if one could call it that—with Sebastian. The earl had long given up trying to rid himself of his attraction to men, but it made it no easier on him. Ciel was putting everything at risk; and for what? Sex?

"I wish you would stop torturing yourself over this," Said a deep voice. Ciel lifted his head from the desk and met eyes with his butler. "How many times must I tell you? You live—"

"In an ignorant society," Ciel finished for him. "I know." Sebastian cocked an eyebrow and nodded. As a silence filled the room, the demon turned around and began to prepare his master's afternoon tea, as was his original reason for entering the room. As he extended his arm to serve his master his drink, he met Ciel's eyes.

"Then why are you still afraid?" He asked. "Why does fear leave you writhing and sick every morning after?" The earl had been about to grab the saucer and cup, but at his butler's words, his hand started to shake.

"S-sebastian," Ciel whispered. The demon smirked at the trembling boy.

"Don't tell me you expect to be struck down by some divine being all your country's churches preach about," He taunted. The boy's head snapped up and he rolled his eyes at his butler's sarcasm.

Ciel Phantomhive was not a religious individual. Quite the opposite, as he had a demon for a butler. By merely walking down the street with such a being was like spitting in the face of his god-fearing country with each step he took.

In fact, when looking back, Ciel wondered if his parents had ever truly bought into any of it either. They attended church services like almost everyone else in England, but that most certainly had been to uphold appearances. The Phantomhive family bore the name of "The Queen's Guard Dog," and associated itself with the Underground. The thought was almost laughable that they could sing hymns in the morning, yet dirty their hands with England's scum in the afternoon.

No, Ciel was not religious, and held no fear towards the so-called "Christian God." He had seen enough Shinigami running around to know that the Bible was definitely lacking in content. And who was it that had pulled him out of the depths of his pathetic despair? Not God, not an angel—a demon. Oh, the irony.

"No," Ciel muttered. "That's not it."

"Then if not the divine, what do you fear?" The earl was growing frustrated at Sebastian's persistence and slammed his fist down on the desk.

"If I am found out—or even suspected of such acts—everything I've worked for—everything _we've_ worked for will vanish." Ciel ripped the eye patch from his face and motioned for Sebastian to remove his glove. The demon did as instructed and the two sat in a moment of silence, starring at their shared marks. "If I am discovered, our contract will fail," Ciel whispered. "Because I would no longer have the right to bear the name of Phantomhive or be a nobleman. I would be sent into servitude or prison. The ones I'm searching for would be forever out of my reach."

"I would never allow that to happen," Sebastian said with a sigh. "My first priority is your life."

"Well then, if I was discovered but you snatched me away from my punishment, we would be fugitives. And those I'm searching for would _still_ be out of reach," Ciel snapped. "I do my best to believe you when you tell me these feelings I have are nothing unusual. I trust you when you say I live in a society ignorantly and needlessly cruel to people like me; but whether you like it or not, Sebastian, my ignorant society's laws hold a huge influence over our contract."

Sebastian narrowed his eyes. His young master certainly had spent long hours thinking over the scenario of being discovered. The demon knew that situation would be problematic, but he had never considered that it would effect their contract like his master had. Who did this boy think Sebastian was? Certainly, it would be a large setback, but was Ciel implying that if such a thing did happen, Sebastian couldn't find a way to fulfill their contract? The demon butler knelt down and bowed low to the boy before him.

"Earl, servant, prisoner, or fugitive, I will be at at your side, Young Master, until the day lies become truth. No laws will nullify our contract, no matter how steep the setback." Ciel's jaw was clenched from surprise. He starred wide-eyed at his butler, the words spoken slowly sinking in to his exhausted brain. Finally, he smirked and motioned for Sebastian to stand up.

"I'll hold you to that, you know."

"Yes, My Lord."

No matter how many times Ciel partook in sexual pleasures with Sebastian, it never failed to feel new and electrifying to him every time. The young earl knew he would never grow tired of his butler's lips or body. It was almost like a drug—intoxicating and addicting, drawing him in deeper and deeper with each new encounter.

Though, to Ciel, those feelings alone were not sufficient. The true reason he loved his encounters with Sebastian was to see him lose control. Even during sex, his ever loyal butler was quiet and poker faced, but if Ciel was lucky enough to see him orgasm, it was certainly a sight to behold. His eyes unfocused, mouth open in a silent moan, and head tilted upwards in ecstasy. Those were the rare moments that Sebastian lost face, and Ciel loved every second of it.

Tears were filling his eyes. The sensations were too much. He shuddered and twitched in pleasure, as Sebastian made him come. The earl bit his lip to stifle his moaning, but it did little good. Ciel was in a haze, but managed to open his eyes and drink in the sight he loved so much—Sebastian losing control. The demon almost looked like a normal human in those moments because some part of him—no matter how small—was vulnerable. And that turned Ciel on unlike anything else in the world.

Meilin ran into the kitchen, and slammed the door shut. Her breathing was heavy, her hair was in disarray, and her hands were shaking. Bard and Finny were staring at her with confused expressions cemented on their faces. What could have scared the maid so horribly?

"The maid saw," she said. "She saw something she shouldn't have!"

"Of course you did," Bard muttered, rolling his eyes. "You always do. So what was it this time?"

"Something horrible," she choked out, tears filling her eyes. "Young Master is—Mister Sebastian—"

"Spit it out," Bard snapped, and the girl began to sob.

"Mister Sebastian is forcing Young Master to participate in buggery!"


End file.
